Of Dreams and other Updates.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEAFY. I LOVE YOU AND YOU'RE A WONDERFUL SISTER. HAPPY CAKE EATING!

Congratulations Fenny on your new blog! Wonder if that was ever a dream, but its certainly not a bad thing. Dreamt about you last night too but it was very strange and i don't think i'm going to tell anyone about it. =P

I had many dreams last night. Also dreamt of Soumi and Grace. But i'm not going to tell anyone about it either.

Two days ago i was playing bubble breaker and i managed to get 49 bubbles together for a combined score of 1650 or something like that. and with my peripheral bubble bursts i could have got a final score of 1850 or higher. Unfortunately a mishap came when Estelle tried to take a picture using it, and the game got wiped before i could take a picture of it cos im sure no one's got a higher score than that. So now my official highest score is still 1458 =(

Never trust a person completely. I was inspired one time by wrestlers on tv, who as you all know do top rope jumps and stuff. So i tried to convince estelle to let me jump on her, and of course i am sorta "trained". Naturally she lifted her knees as an instinctive defensive manoeuvre, and i got caught in the worst possible place. Good thing i have good genes and a solid frame.

I spent monday night playing tv trivia, and then did a hundred pushups. Bad mistake. It's saturday morning and i'm still aching.

I went to my first NYC club last night cos a friend invited me. I decided to go since work hasn't really piled up yet and midterms are still some time away. The DJ sucked, MOS was much better. But then maybe i just share local tastes more.

Zhonglei is here in NYC with Nikolaus. Time to meet and greet!

Reunions

I was looking through the "my downloads" folder on my computer when i came across this picture:



And then it made me pause and wish that we had taken a similar foto of us back in sec1 and sec2. It was a great reunion that day at Mrs Soh's for us to see one another after such a long time. Its funny how so much has happened since Sec 2 (1998). 8 years man. Yet some things never really change. Take Joel for example: he looks exactly the same as he did in Sec2, as do most of us i guess, just maybe 20 cm shorter then.

I always enjoy reunions. Meeting old friends and classmates and stuff. For some reason, a small gathering may feel awkward, but a big one like this one always seems so comfortable. Like a mini time warp back to the "good ol days".

Maybe thats why i always like going out with study group even though sometimes i feel reserved because i might not feel like i have anything to say, yet the feeling of being all together again and catching up and looking back all at the same time, its just a marvellous feeling.

Family's not excluded from this either. I love meeting my uncles and aunties, cousins and grandparents. Even if i seldom talk to my grandparents (perhaps its the language/age barrier) just seeing them and exchanging a word or two over dinner makes me really happy, and i'd hope its the same for them too. Wahhh... Cousins i miss you all man. Looking forward to seeing you guys again at the next cousin outing (whenever that will be).

And of course, DaddyO, AhMua, Fluffy, Leafy, Fuzzy and Lyn. I love you all and can't wait to be back home again. Even if we never talk all the time, its just a great feeling being home when everyone's around. Its as if we exchange vibes. Man, chinese new year is going to be so lonely here in NY. At least Estelle is here =)

Damn, i wonder when my next reunion is going to be.

Ok its 7am, i just finished some work for the day, and i'm going to get ready for class.

PS. groups and people i didn't mention, it doesn't mean i don't miss you all ok. Sheesh so sentimental. *shiver*

Weekend again

Had a great weekend today, by normal standards. Spent some quality time with Estelle, rented 2 movies, one of which was "Y tu mama tambien", and that was rather interesting.

Bought new sheets from macys cos i got a new comforter and a new pillow. I decided that even though the bed was comfortable by army standards, i wanted to risk not getting up from a new and improved bed every morning, because having a good bed to sleep in is one of life's greatest "simple" pleasures.

Some homework to be done by tomorrow. But i'm blogging yet again. Well the homework isn't hard, it's just i lack the motivation to do it early. I'm not sure if its procrastination at work again (there's some truth in here) or something larger, but basically i need to figure out what i want from this experience. Somehow my conscious mind and my subconscious have very different ideas of what my life should be like, and that kinda makes me confused.

I've picked up reading as a habit over the summer. I now read books at a rate of maybe a book a week, and lately i've been focusing on nutrition, not just because i'm bored but rather i think there's alot we can learn from nutrition. Today, the popular mindset is to see a doctor to cure your diseases, but seemingly people have forgotten that prevention is better than cure, especially with regards to the body. Unfortunately reading about nutrition also means that i am now faced with the dilemma of choosing-- eating nutritious food that probably costs more or tastes less, or choosing not to care and suffer its consequences: because when you didn't know any better, it was much easier not to care. Its like people who drink or smoke: they know full well the consequences, but they choose it anyway. Would you favour having a proper diet and doing homework on personal nutrition or would you choose not to care?

Choices.

i think i need to get work done now. its quite about time

Whatever comes to mind

;gdsibpijvzcl'sgafd m'sdfvojkcxb'ds.,vcz93tjd m;lcvzaajp
d f'vdnm dso
sijsdposdihnvcl;zixv
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog
the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog

easy easy easy

Chill

The chill of the night that rankles through my bones
That, which no longer seems familiar
Pained, from all the world has suffered me
A conscience forever unclear

Tis familiarity, that I unconsciously seek
That only just, have I discovered
Such habits are mine to dream of
The riches of struggles uncovered

To what do I owe this lethargy?
The cold? The smoke? The pollution?
My strength wanes more each day
Till a habitual revolution

Time to burn

Well that's something i guess all of us wish we had. It's funny how time seems to pass faster in NY than in singapore. The work's started to pile on now, and i'm still coping ok. Seems this sem will be easier than i expected.

I had a good day yesterday at central park with the SSA ppl and estelle, we played frisbee (and i scored a good one hurrah), then walked down the columbus ave fair. Unfortunately i sprained my neck, you know, when it twists a lil too hard and then aches for 2 days after. Should have warmed up. Once again i feel the age coming back. Or maybe its just that i haven't been going to the gym as much as i should.

Its funny how i notice a new dynamic in my habits: i like reading, and wouldn't even mind reading textbooks and stuff cos i think its pretty fun or informative. My problem comes when i have to DO assignments and stuff. Seems all the activity i had during summer hasn't benefitted me too much in terms of sitting down and completing assignments: then again i always did my assignments, i just need to finish them earlier and stop procrastinating.

Yup, dota's out of my system (haha i bet the parents will be happy about this), and i'm trying to replace this with sports to keep healthy. But then i got addicted to bubble breaker on my fone. I found out that i'm obsessed with keeping averages: like i've got something to prove, that i'm achieving a certain standard i set for myself. Now to obsess over grades =D.

I guess things have been moving slower for me in new york than in singapore. Its good that estelle is here for me, makes things much easier as compared to having a LDR the last time round. And she makes me want to study harder. Good deal =)

Well actually i do have assignments due on thursday and friday and next monday so i really shouldn't be blogging too much already. I do say though, i'm glad that i'm spending so much less time on the computer nowadays.

Alright, back to work. Updates to keep us going.

PS. I didn't know you could watch movies on YouTube!

Krabi

I went to Krabi


With this beautiful person


To see nice sights like this


Because we could do this


But most of the time i saw this


And though it was great seeing this


It was better seeing it with this



The End.

Thoughts

Sept 11 passed in NYC without much happening. I took some pictures of the NY fire dept outside my dorm, with the flag at half mast, and bouqets lying quietly by the road. There were 2 candles by the bouquets, of which many were brightly coloured (like the lives of those they commemmorated), 2 candles which burnt throughout the day.

Nothing much happened in Palladium Suite 911 either. It was just an ordinary day, yet a day that changed the world (the US at least think that the states = the world). I thought that if the US followed the date system of ddmmyy like the rest of the world instead of mmddyy, then we might be commemmorating November the 9th.

Just thinking that it's been 5 years since we all saw for ourselves the two planes crashing into the towers, the collapse, the trauma, the news, and all of that. And i think: What's happened to our lives since then? Have our lives changed much?

I guess alot must have happened to each and every one of us in the last 5 years, whether we choose to remember it or not, whether we do think each and every event worthy of mention.

Where do you see yourselves 5 years from now? Going back to school has somehow whitewashed my eyes. What i see is determined by the people around me. And that's scary. I still want to smell freedom. Not just freedom to live, but freedom to be. That's something else entirely different, and that's something that's gonna cost.

Freedom isn't free.

Its september the 13th today. (Which is kailing's birthday) And school has more or less started full swing. I haven't been feeling the brunt of the school workload yet but i know its going to come really soon. I'm glad i'm not dotaing anymore but even then i'm still occupied. I wonder why.

Back to work, its 1130pm

First Day

Well just had my first day of school since coming back to new york, and i guess it was nice. Saw 2 impossible people, one from my floor and one from my Money and Banking class. Well impossible, because they look so good they can't possibly exist. Anyway, it was kinda nice getting back into the swing of things.

Had lunch with Daryl and Cliff today, and realised something: I'm not sure i'm going where i want to be. Or perhaps, i'm not sure of where i want to be. We talked about stuff.. How things were going, how we were going where we wanted to, and what we needed to get there, and i realised that i'm not sure i wanted to go where i thought i was going to go. Maybe its that thing about living 2 lives: Kin(SG) wants to go someplace and Kin(NY)somewhere else. Very creepy.

Its kinda weird how 3.5 mths just went past like that, and i lived another life. Momentarily, a life with some semblance of purpose, of dreams. I was not one to dream, until i saw a nightmare. My dream book is still empty. Maybe i need to talk to Peter Cox. And im just sitting here, waiting for someone, to hook me up to the fast track.

I'm not sure what i want to say right now. I'm taking this course called expressive cultures: Words, and the Prof was saying that the thing about words and the feelings they convey is that sometimes, the words generate the feelings in the reader, and sometimes its the feelings that inspire the words. Very chicken and egg. And of course, there is a range of emotion that words can only hope to express, that of the intense personal experience. That leaves words to express emotions or feelings of the lesser kind, the common kind. Well words aren't coming to me right now for the things i want to express, and i'm glad this works to my advantage in the sense that i now don't appear to have a sub-par vocab that hinders my range of expression. Then again i do admit to having a sub-par vocab heh.

Ok its 3am. Gotta wake up in 6 hours. 5 if i want breakfast. I want to make my power breakfast!!

Will update more. I hate being in a state of emotional turmoil.

A New Beginning

Ok this is kinda like starwars....


So the first episode is over, and the second and third take place in quick succession. Well i'm not quite sure if it's as quick as its supposed to be, but then again, who Cares?

I had a good summer, travelling a tad around southeast asia, and finding my place in the universe. Met people who have conditioned me to dream big, and i guess thats when you start to look around you and realise that each person has to find his/her purpose (if currently undecided) and choose to follow it to some higher order of things. I don't know if what i desire is truly higher order, but i can feel the focus coming back onto the studying part of things. I only pray that i will not let anyone down, because i'm often told i'm capable, but fall short of standards. So i will find and attempt to commit myself for my bros, to do each part i can for them


Ok, its late and time to rest.
Tome to